To my surprise, I never write a review of The Life Changing Magic of Not Giving a Fuck, well I should I have, definitely checked that out. As I read the former quite a long ago, I prefer to review another book by Sarah Knight that I recently read called You Do You, but it might also have been called “an excuse to be unapologitically yourself from now on.” Sarah defined herself as an antiguru of self-development, she writes book for people who do not like traditional self-development and having read and liked both, I can say that she is indeed a breath of fresh air in the self-development world.
First of all, she acknowlegdes her privileges, which many authors do not do, they just assume everyone is born with the same advantages as them. The other thing is that you can see she is clearly educated by the litterrary references she uses, but at the same time she does not take herself too seriously and she is funny. All of this makes the read a really pleasant one.
Now about the book itself, it is good ! From the beginning to the end, I loved her point of view on the matter but let me share the tiny bits that I could relate the most to…
Knight introduces this notion that we have all signed a social contract, and that somehow we put in our heads that we need to respect it whereas it wouldn’t hurt anybody neither will help them if we don’t. Yes, some people will look weirdly at you and give you their unwanted opinion but in the words of Knight herself…f**ck them ! You do you ! She also sees death as I see it meaning that we are going to die so we might as well, for example…be selfish ! Yes, selfish ! Do you prefer to get a full 8 hours of sleep and priorize that so that you can handle your family when you wake or do not make time for yourself and not getting those 8 hours of sleep and then be grumpy all day around your family ? If you ask me, the answer is obvious ! Ain’t for nothing we ask you to put your own oxygen mask before putting the oxygen mask of your children…Being selfish can be helpful in several cases, and no, it is not a bad thing ! And if we are going to die tomorrow, we might as well be yourself without caring about what people think, we respect them but beyond that, you do you girl !
She had also an interesting view about the fact that you won’t get a good job, if you don’t go to college…well how are they to define what good is ? And I am the proof that indeed you do not need a diploma to get a job, a great motivation and a lot of preparation can take you higher than a piece of paper sometimes. Of course, you can read all about my opinion here. I must say that I think Knigh and I share the same.
Now, about people who tell you to smile more…Knight advise you to tell them to kindly fuck off ! And I live for it. No, we do not to be smiling 24 hours a day if there is no reason to, there is a lot of reasons why someone is not smiling and you do not walk in their shoes…so shut up ! (my two cents: the same goes for people who like to point out that you look tired…seriously who want to hear that ??)
The social contract also tell us that we should be a good team player. It is no secret than extroversion is looked as the model to be and that people who are introverted are seen as weird, lunatic and in their own world, which I must admit most of the time we are. However, I like that so I will embrace it from now on. Something that pissed me off at work is my co-workers who by kindness invite me to eat with them and then we end up having small talks….Do you know what introverts hate ? SMALL TALKS ! So I know you complete your part of the social contract by being kind but kindly fuck off as well.
“It’s not weird or bad to prefer the company of yourself over others.”
Knight offers more examples of social contract that we think we have to respect ranging from “Don’t be Difficult” to “Don’t Quit Your Day Job”, and has interesting point of views to share on all of those.
What I am taking from this book is that you can absolutely not go to college, and have a job DUH ! Also, I do not have smile if I do not want to and it is totally ok to not be a team player when I have no reason to and this makes me so much happier 😀
If you want to feel good about yourself pretty quick, picking up a book write by Sarah Knight is never a bad idea !
Wishing you the best of luck.